It's Only Day 8 And I'm *Already* Feeling Stabby

By now you must know that I've returned to college life. If you do not know this, go here.

So, it is now a whopping 8 days into the semester and I'm ready to scream. The word I am about to throw down has been known to cause riots. It is a horrible, horrible word. This word strikes revulsion in the hearts of millions. Well, maybe thousands. Ok, ok. Just me. It strikes revulsion in me. The word is.......

SOCIOLOGY.

Even now I'm cringing. It makes my eye tic, my palms sweat. I get the distinct feeling of wanting to gouge my own eyeballs out with a spork. Saying it out loud makes me throw up in my mouth a little. It has become the new bane of my existence. I have never, never despised a class so thoroughly since my 9th grade Honors English class. And then it wasn't the class (I love English and have petitioned for a paid position on the Grammar Police squad. Still waiting for my acceptance letter...) so much as it was the hag who called herself a teacher. Lemme break it down for you.

I am not a social butterfly. I do not have many relationships. I don't flit from friend to friend, go to the mall just to hang out (or for anything, really), and I'm not attached permanently to my cell phone. My dance card is never full.

My idea of a perfect day/week/vacation is me, alone, with a few good books. And cheesecake.

 I am, however, a concrete thinker. I believe in a black-and-white system for almost everything. To me, there are very few instances where the possibility of grey even comes into play.

Yeahhhhh..... Ummmm... Attention dumb-ass me: Sociology is an abstract concept. Aaaaaaand? It's the freaking abstract study of PEOPLE. You know, people. Those annoying things that you don't like (and barely tolerate). Messy, loud, obnoxious, demanding, opinionated, rednecky, shitty driving people. Massive, hoard-y amounts of the public. It basically is my worst academic nightmare in the form of a rather innocuous looking book.

It totally doesn't *seem* like it could incite homicide....

I have to, somehow, get through reading 13 more chapters, do chapter quizzes for each one, 4 unit tests, a video reaction paper (the hell?), and some sort of essay. OH! And since the course is online, in lieu of physically attending class, I have to participate in discussions. I figure they are like message boards. Doesn't sound so bad, right? <insert annoying buzzer sound here> WRONG!

There are 4 mandatory discussions; one for each of the units. The instructor poses a couple of questions and/or topics that you have to demonstrate your grasp of. Also, you have to read everyone else's rhetoric. Not just read, but comment on two of them on two different days. I looked ahead to see what the topics were gonna be.

Oh. Em. Gee. Y'all. Every one is how society affects this, and expound on such-and-such theory. Every. Single. One. I mean, theories, for crying out loud. THEORIES! They are just one step removed from guesses!! Guesses, people! How much more abstract can you get?

Anyway, I just took a break from pulling my hair out to write this. I guess I better get back to it... before I decide to chuck the book out in the yard. I better tell Terry to make sure we don't have any sporks handy.....

Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho. It's Back To School I Go

Here is where my brain is reenacting the opening-ish scene from Grease 2. You know, the "Back To School Again" song and dance number.

What "back to school" looks like in my head

What "back to school" means in reality

So, in case you haven't guessed (honestly, people, I don't know how I could have made it any easier for you...) by now, I have enrolled for classes in the Fall. And by "Fall" I mean 3 weeks from now. And yes, classes plural. I am now enrolled in 3 classes for a total of 9 credit hours this semester.

I started seriously considering the whole school thing a couple of months ago. I began thinking that since it's evident that since I'm not going to be a kept woman I should find something I want to do. No easy feat, that. I don't want to do much of anything, Unless, of course, I could get paid sleeping late and reading. Or being a student. I would totally just take classes on everything if I could make that my job. Sadly, no one is beating down my door to offer me gobs of cash for doing things I love. So, if doing what I want is out, the next best thing is doing something I'm interested in. For me, it's the macabre.

There. I said it. I love morbid stuff. Dead people? Awesome. Crime scenes? The gorier the better. So, dear reader(s), I am pursuing a degree in Criminal Justice so I can gawk (legally) at crime scenes and poke at dead people (again, legally).

Right now, adding up the classes I took *cough* 13 years ago (and they do count), I only need 23 hours, I think. If my calculations are correct, and I hope to all that's holy they are, I could maybe, possibly, potentially graduate with my Associates in the Spring. Yep. Just 2 short semesters and I will have my piddly-ass Associates degree. Then, with luck, gray hair and time (oh, and lots of money), I will transfer into the Bacheleor program to finish up. I was a lot closer that I thought I was. Of course, all the minutia of daily living for 13 years kinda hampers the recollection of trifling matters like college degrees.

You may be asking yourself, "Well, smartypants, what classes are you going to take?". Honestly, I'm super glad you asked. Since I registered kinda late in the game I didn't have much of an option. Luckily, though, all 3 of the classes I'm taking are online. I can go to class in my pajamas. Without makeup. Naked. (I totally wouldn't go to class naked. Probably.)

Anyway... The 3 lucky recipients of my time are: Intro to Sociology, Intro to Criminal Justice, and Intro to Law Enforcement. All that I need is a math, my 2nd Environmental Science, Intro to the Legal Process, and Intro to Corrections.

So there you have it. My short term goal to complete my Associates. I seriously hope I can handle passing 3 classes. Especially since we have been without the internet at home for almost a year. I guess my in-laws will be seeing a LOT more of me....


*Photo credit for both images: Bing.com